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The Language of Sex: Experiencing the Beauty of Sexual Intimacy [Hardcover]

By Gary Smalley (Author) & Ted Cunningham (Author)
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Item Number 82405  
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Item description for The Language of Sex: Experiencing the Beauty of Sexual Intimacy by Gary Smalley & Ted Cunningham...

In Smalley's first book on the topic of sex, he explores the differences between men and women emotionally, spiritually, and physically. He takes a biblical look at the topic of sex in the marriage relationship and answers questions such as, What does the Bible say about sex?

Publishers Description
Relationship expert Gary Smalley, best-selling author of The Blessing and The Language of Love, finally tackles a topic that's on everybody's mind: sex. With his pastor and friend, Ted Cunningham, Smalley nudges past our hang-ups and sacred cows to answer the question, How can I have the best sex of my life? The answer may surprise you. Did you know that great sex begins with security, which leads to intimacy, which leads to incredible sex? It's only as we take an honest look at the differences between men and women and find ways to bridge the gap that we can create the security and intimacy that great sex needs to flourish. In The Language of Sex, Smalley and Ted Cunningham peel back the layers of mystery and show us how to do just that

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Item Specifications...

Studio: Regal Books
Pages   229
Est. Packaging Dimensions:   Length: 1" Width: 6.25" Height: 9"
Weight:   1 lbs.
Binding  Hardcover
Release Date   Apr 1, 2008
Age  18-10
ISBN  0830745688  
ISBN13  9780830745685  

Availability  0 units.

More About Gary Smalley & Ted Cunningham

Gary Smalley Dan Walsh is the bestselling author of several books, including The Dance and The Promise with Gary Smalley, as well as The Unfinished Gift, The Discovery, and The Reunion. He has won three Carol Awards, and two of his novels were finalists for RT Book Reviews Inspirational Book of the Year for 2011 and 2012. A member of American Christian Fiction Writers, Dan served as a pastor for 25 years. He lives with his wife in the Daytona Beach area, where he's busy researching and writing his next novel. Learn more at
Gary Smalley is one of the country's best known authors and speakers on family relationships. He is the bestselling and award-winning author or coauthor of 16 books, along with several popular films and videos. He has spent over 30 years learning, teaching, and counseling, speaking to over 2 million people in live conferences. Smalley has appeared on national television programs such as Oprah, Larry King Live, Extra, The Today Show, and The Sally Jessy Raphael Show, as well as numerous national radio programs. Gary and his wife, Norma, have been married for 50 years and live in Colorado.

Gary Smalley currently resides in Branson, in the state of Missouri.

Gary Smalley has published or released items in the following series...
  1. Enfoque a la Familia
  2. LifeChange
  3. Nelson Pocket: Crianza de los Hijos
  4. Restoration (Flemming H. Revell)
  5. Safe Harbor

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Product Categories

1Books > Subjects > Religion & Spirituality > Christianity > Christian Living > Relationships > Marriage
3Books > Subjects > Religion & Spirituality

Christian Product Categories
Books > Christian Living > Relationships > Love & Marriage
Books > Christian Living > Practical Life > General

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Reviews - What do customers think about Language Of Sex?

A challenge worth risking  Jan 19, 2009
An awesome book and an eye opener. A must read for all couples whether newly married or been around for a few years. Don't wait any longer to check out this great insight on how to build and or strengthen your marriage!!
The Language of Sex--A FirstLook  Sep 24, 2008
The Language of Sex--A FirstLook Feature

Is sex keeping your relationship alive? Or better yet, is your relationship keeping your sex life alive?

Dr. Gary Smalley and Pastor Ted Cunningham have just published The Language of Sex: Experiencing the Beauty of Sexual Intimacy. Written from a Christian perspective, this is Dr. Smalley's first book on the topic of sex. Long held as a taboo topic within the church, today's Christians are beginning to open up about their sex lives, its problems, and solutions. Dr. Smalley believes that sex is largely undiscussed because it is a private often uncomfortable subject, similar to talking about one's own funeral. However, to properly honor and protect the sexual relationship, he states that it must be discussed. The Bible, he writes "provides more instruction and guidance for how to make a baby than for how to take care of one! God has given us sex as a gift and it's one to be thoroughly treasured, celebrated and enjoyed."1070759-1506393-thumbnail.jpg

After being in relationship ministry for 45 years, Dr. Smalley has traced most sexual issues in marriage back to relationship problems. Each marriage has a formula for great sex, beginning with honor, developing into security, leading to intimacy, and finalizing with sex. "The best sex of your life starts in your heart, not in your head or between your legs." Sex is the result of building upon a secure loving relationship. "Sexual problems are indicative of greater issues."

Think about your relationship with your spouse. Do you:

Consider your husband/wife to be extremely important?

Value your spouse's thoughts?

Have you kept your commitment to the relationship since your marriage? Sexually? Emotionally?

Do you speak derisively about your spouse when he/she is present? When absent?

Unresolved conflicts about work, money, friends, etc..lead to a lack of security and intimacy in marriage. Dr. Smalley believes that security must be nurtured within the relationship.

Dr. Smalley's Top Tips on Growing Security Within Marriage:

Guard your spouse's heart: Don't go to bed angry at each other. Commit to this, if possible, at the beginning of your marriage. You'll never need to sleep on the couch or leave the home.

Create boundaries: Form a union between you and your spouse, that cannot be separated by anything or anyone. This includes old girlfriends, addictions, and parents.

Don't use sex as a weapon or a reward: Do you have a headache tonight? Once in awhile, that's ok. Every time your spouse wants to have sex? That's a no-no. Do not attempt to control your marriage or spouse with sex. Sex is for both the husband's and wife's mutual enjoyment.

Commit sexually to your spouse for life: Keep sex completely within the bounds of your marriage: physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

Enjoy make-up sex by practicing the five-minute rule: Take a five-minute break after an argument. Listen more, speak less, anger slowly.

Today it's easy to just dump the marriage when difficulties arise, looking elsewhere for happiness. But relationships rarely improve with a change of partners. Instead, both men and women should spend a little more time investing in an awareness of their spouses' needs, desires, and uniqueness. Your spouse is the person you chose to love, honor, and commit to. The Language of Sex, a must read for every marriage, will certainly help couples resolve issues, leading to greater intimacy within the marriage.

BackStory: Gary Smalley, best-selling author of The Language of Love (Angel Award Winner), The Blessing and The Two Sides of Love (Gold Medallion Award Winners), is president and founder of the Smalley Relationship Center. His books have sold over six million copies.

Ted Cunningham is the pastor of Woodland Hills community Church in Branson, Missouri, which received a Purpose Driven Church Health Award in 2006. Ted is a speaker with the Smalley Relationship Center.

5 Stars
Excellent book and authors  Sep 16, 2008
This book is an awesome book!!! I read it in two days while out camping and found it to be so full of great info. Would recommend all people married and unarried to read this book and glean the nuggets from it.
A Spicy Read!  May 28, 2008
What a great book! In our early years of marriage, we read a lot about the differences between men and women. We felt like we had very open communication about sex. But after 12 years of marriage and 3 kids later, it's easy to fall into a rut. This book has reminded us of the importance of sexual intimacy and has us talking about it again. It's relevant and has been a great discussion starter. We love the summaries and pillow talk questions at the end of each chapter. Thank you Ted C. & Dr. Smalley for sharing your stories and for making what can be an uncomfortable topic, easy to discuss.
The Language of Sex  May 24, 2008
I love this book! At first I wasn't sure I wanted my husband to read it (he doesn't need any ecouragement here), but it really validated what I need as a woman. I think some husbands take the scripture about the husband and wives bodies not being there own as a scriptural excuse for being selfish. I think Ted and Gary do a great job communicating what women need. It was a great way to discuss a topic that is sometimes really hard. I also loved all their stories, I found it a really easy read-I think this would make a great Father's Day gift!

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