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I'm Pregnant, Now What?: Heartfelt Advice on Getting Through an Unplanned Pregnancy [Paperback]

By Ruth Graham (Author) & Sara Dormon (Author)
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Item Number 8162  
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Item description for I'm Pregnant, Now What?: Heartfelt Advice on Getting Through an Unplanned Pregnancy by Ruth Graham & Sara Dormon...

Overview
In addition to telling the story of how she dealt with her teenage daughter's two pregnancies, Billy Graham's daughter Ruth and Dormon have compiled testimonies from pregnant girls, their families, adoptive couples, and an adult adoptee.

Publishers Description
We have been where you are. Our book comes out of experience. This book has been written by people who know what you are confronting. If you are reading this, you are full of questions for which you have few if any, answers. People may be giving you answers, but they do not really know your questions and do not seem to be listening to you. You are under a great amount of stress and pressure. You may be alone in your dilemma with no support from those who made you promises. You feel rejected and betrayed. You are hurt and angry. We understand those feelings. It is our desire to address your needs factually and to encourage you. We will examine the issues involved from all sides and give you the best information available so you can make a decision with which you can live.

Citations And Professional Reviews
I'm Pregnant, Now What?: Heartfelt Advice on Getting Through an Unplanned Pregnancy by Ruth Graham & Sara Dormon has been reviewed by professional book reviewers and journalists at the following establishments -
  • CBA Retailers - 11/01/2004 page 34
  • Christian Retailing - 09/03/2007 page 39


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Item Specifications...


Studio: Regal Books
Pages   208
Est. Packaging Dimensions:   Length: 8.48" Width: 5.52" Height: 0.49"
Weight:   0.56 lbs.
Binding  Softcover
Release Date   Apr 16, 2013
Publisher   GOSPEL LIGHT PUBLISHERS #9
ISBN  0830735755  
ISBN13  9780830735754  


Availability  0 units.


More About Ruth Graham & Sara Dormon


Register your artisan biography and upload your photo! Ruth Graham, the daughter of evangelist Billy Graham, is an author and national speaker on unplanned pregnancy. Because of her daughter's two teenaged pregnancies, Ruth has traveled extensively, sharing about her daughter's and her experiences in order to help young women and their families through similar hardships. Ruth is currently on the board of Birthmothers, a nonprofit, parachurch organization that provides confidential, non-judgmental assistance to any woman facing an unplanned pregnancy.
Sara Dormon, PhD, is a clinical psychologist specializing in women's issues and crisis pregnancies. For more than thirty years, she has worked with young women and their families as they deal with unplanned pregnancies. Sara has been interviewed on television and radio, covering the issues of teen pregnancy, abortion, and adoption.

Ruth Graham was born in 1950.

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Product Categories

1Books > Subjects > Health, Mind & Body > Personal Health > Women's Health > Pregnancy & Childbirth > General
2Books > Subjects > Nonfiction > Social Sciences > General
3Books > Subjects > Nonfiction > Social Sciences > Sociology > General
4Books > Subjects > Religion & Spirituality > Christianity > Christian Living > General
5Books > Subjects > Religion & Spirituality > Christianity > Christian Living > Womens Issues


Christian Product Categories
Books > Christian Living > Practical Life > General



Reviews - What do customers think about I'm Pregnant... Now What??

A valuable resource on dealing with crisis pregnancies  Dec 10, 2004
When Ruth Graham, daughter of Billy and sister to Anne and Franklin, learned that her 16-year-old daughter Windsor was pregnant, she hopped aboard an emotional roller coaster.

"I was both angry at Windsor, wanting to shake her, and yet compassionate, longing to hold her and make everything all right. She could not seem to see that I was trying to help. Worn out with the tension between needing to be wise and wanting to wash my hands of it all, I wanted to escape. And yet there was no place far enough away to remove the knots in my stomach, the anxiety in my mind and the ache in my heart."

This kind of honesty characterizes her new book, co-authored with clinical psychologist Sara Dormon. A specialist in dealing with crisis pregnancies, Dormon provides solid advice to both young mothers-to-be and the people who surround them at the end of each chapter. And while the perspectives of several women who have dealt with their own unplanned pregnancies or those of loved ones are included in the book, it's Ruth and her daughter Windsor (who might also deserve an author credit) who provide the book's heart and soul. Taking turns, they detail the difficult decisions and steps that had to be made when Windsor got pregnant, not just once, but twice, as a teenager.

Here, they each write about Ruth's decision not to provide a home for Windsor and her baby during the first pregnancy:

Ruth: "To help with making so many decisions with far-reaching consequences, I found that I needed someone to talk to --- someone wise and grounded. I chose to go to a local pastor for advice. He raised issues I hadn't thought of: the deeper questions of motivations, ego and spiritual components. He probed to find out if I thought God was calling me to raise the baby with Windsor. He counseled me to pray about what God would have me do.

"My commonsense conviction was that Windsor was not ready to be a parent. And I knew that parenting wouldn't make her grow up. I wanted her to be able to finish high school unencumbered with responsibility for a child. When I took the pastor's counsel and prayed about it, I felt I could not take responsibility for Windsor's life and its consequences, but that she had to face those herself. I felt that stepping in and raising the baby in my home was not best for the baby, Windsor or me. I had to trust God with the results of my decision."

Windsor: "When my mother made up her mind that she would have no part in helping me raise this baby it forced me to have to think. Of course I kept trying to change my mother's mind, but she wouldn't budge. I had to ask the practical questions: What was I going to do? Where would I live? How would I support myself? In my heart I already knew that I couldn't raise this baby alone, but I felt that if I admitted that, it would mean I had failed again.

"Every day there was an emotional battle going on inside of me. Every day I was torn between my desires to mother this baby or to give my child a better life ... My mother and I were very much at odds with each other. Abandonment isn't a strong enough word to describe how I felt. When she informed me of her decision to not help me with my child I felt helplessly alone. It was a different kind of lonely, more like drowning where no one can hear you calling for help."

The tension and distress between Ruth and Windsor as they struggle to figure out how each of them will deal with this pregnancy is not a pretty picture. But this is a pretty good indication that these women are telling the truth without sugarcoating it. And this is just the kind of straightforward talk that women and girls dealing with crisis pregnancies need to hear.

Windsor decided to release her first baby to adoptive parents, but she kept the second child. However, only cursory attention is given to the second decision. The bulk of the material in this book is about adoption --- why and when it's a good option, how to go about finding adoptive parents, and especially, how hard it is to give away your child. The emphasis on and advocacy for adoption is so pervasive that the book could have been titled "You're Pregnant? Consider Adoption."

Indeed, adoption is a beautiful decision for both a birth mother without options and an adoptive family. As an alternative to abortion, adoption is clearly the more loving and healthy approach to a crisis pregnancy. And that is a worthy goal of the book --- to present adoption as a viable alternative to young women who would consider abortion because they can't take care of a child on their own and don't have a support structure to help.

Still, as I read this book, I was frequently frustrated that Windsor herself didn't have a support structure that would help her raise her child. It's incredibly pompous of a book reviewer to second-guess the heart-rending decision made by Ruth not to open her home and reorder her life around her grandchild. However, I do think it's worthwhile to mention the idea of a community --- whether it's family, friends, church members, or any combination of the above --- coming together to support a young women in such a way that she is able to continue on with her life, now as a mother, in a holistic way. By all accounts, adoption creates a wound that never heals. Sometimes this wound is an easy tradeoff when compared to the suffering that might be caused by other options. But if it's at all possible for a mother to keep and raise her child in a Godly, loving and supportive environment, how much sacrifice should the body of Christ be willing to make to facilitate that wholeness?

I don't pose this question lightly. My own family and I have had to grapple with it on a very personal level. And just as I'm PREGNANT...NOW WHAT? focuses primarily on the pros and cons of adoption, a similar book might be written about the pros and cons of creating that support structure to allow a young woman to keep her child.

So while it's not a thorough exploration of all the options open to young women facing crisis pregnancies, I'M PREGNANT...NOW WHAT? is still an important and valuable resource for the young women themselves and for those who would prayerfully support these mothers, whatever decisions they make.

--- Reviewed by Lisa Ann Cockrel
 

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