Item description for The Art of Understanding Your Mate by Cecil G. Osborne...
Overview This reissue of a best-seller takes a realistic approach to marriage that deals candidly with incompatibility. It includes ten commandments for husbands and wives.
Publishers Description If you've ever wondered exactly what is going on in your mate's mind, you can probably find it somewhere in the pages of The Art of Understanding Your Mate. Cecil Osborne casts a clinical eye on the underlying psychological forces that drive married relationships. His common sense outlook on counseling troubled couples is based on a solid understanding of human behavior. Illuminating insights tumble from the pages of his book. In addition, Osborne has a keen ear for the spoken word. Through a liberal injection of actual dialogue, he captures the feelings of drama and tensions between husband and wife. Osborne advocates a realistic approach to marriage. He cautions couples to expect to encounter problems of incompatibility. Men and women are different. Their needs are different, as are the emotions that accompany those needs. The wonder is, Osborne points out, that there are so many successful marriages.
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Reviews - What do customers think about Art Of Understanding Your Mate?
Excellent Christian Wisdom Aug 11, 2005
The wisdom of the writer is timeless based on Christian fundamentals. It helped our marriage many years ago and now I am buying it to give it as a tool to others who have shaky marriages. I highly recommend it.
The Art of Understanding Your Mate Dec 10, 1999
This is a timeless guide to the principles which undergird a healthy marriage. The ability to see a problem or a situation from your spouse's perspective is what makes Dr. Osborne's book so helpful. He uses anecdotes and scriptural references to help the reader see beneath the surface of our mate. Men and women are different and knowing how those differences affect our interpersonal communication leads to understanding. That, and the realization that marriage is about sacrifice and putting someone else's interest ahead of our own. There is no such thing as marriage being a 50/50 proposition, or even 60/40. Those kinds of expectations inevitably result in disappointment because our spouse rarely has the same expectations we do. Changing our own expectations and our own behavior first is what Dr. Osborne teaches will effect changes in our mate and ultimately our marriage. My first exposure to this book was 16 years ago when my wife handed it to me with the admonition, "Read it or else." Naturally I followed her excellent advice and it saved our marriage. Since then I have used it as a tool to help others whose marriages are in difficulty. I keep several copies on the shelf to hand out as needed. Definitely worth the read.
Timeless Wisdom. Sep 1, 1999
Understanding Your Mate reflects only a small part of the wisdom shared in Osborne's earlier work - The Art of Understanding Yourself - If you can find a copy of this don't pass it up! Although "Art of Understanding Your Mate" may seem dated in some aspects, most conflicts and behaviours in a relationship have the same root now as they did a generation ago. Osborne helps us understand the source of inter/personal conflict and strategies to resolve the cause, not just the effect - We cannot change another person directly. We can however change ourselves and give the other person room to respond in kind. The art of a successful Christian marriage is not wait for your spouse to serve your needs, but first to satisfy the needs of your spouse. If your spouse in return seeks to understand and answer your needs, both will be generously fulfilled. This book came into my life when it was most needed and I am grateful. It would make an excellent resource for small group study, even better when combined with "The Five Languages Of Love".
"The Art of MISunderstanding Your Mate".... Mar 23, 1999
This book, originally published in the early 70s, is WAY outdated. Osborne maintains (I am not far from quoting) that unless a woman gets married, gets pregnant, and has a bunch of kids she will never be satisfied. A woman's place is in the home, a man's is at the office, and apparently realizing this is supposed to let you and your mate in on your true identities and lead to blissful lives. Furthermore (and perhaps worse), Osborne insists on stereotyping males and females in ways that were very offensive to both me and my husband. Example: women like to fight to test whether their husband will dominate them, because in the end they like to be dominated. The further we read, the more disgusted we became. Unless you live on some other planet or possibly in some other time period, this book will only lead to MISunderstanding each other. Don't waste your money.