Item description for Why Good People Make Bad Choices: How You Can Develop Peace Of Mind Through Integrity (New Horizons in Therapy Series) by Charles Lawrence Allen...
Suppose that four simple instinctual directives helped to bring about the survival of the human species. While good for survival purposes, those directives have also been at the heart of most human problems.
Why Good People Make Bad Choices takes you on a journey of self-discovery by way of new insights about the human condition. The instinctual directives we follow are described as-the ego's agenda. Due to this agenda, we experience problematic feelings, maintain maladaptive thoughts, and engage in behaviors that we know are not in our best interest-indeed, we make bad choices. The solution is integrity. With this book you can learn how to:
Create integrity, and recognize it in others.
Create peace of mind.
Resolve problematic feelings that may interfere with sustaining integrity.
Create a self-image you can be proud of.
Transform any unwanted behavior or thoughts into new valued behavior.
Understand and manage anger, worry, guilt, bad habits, anxiety, and depression.
Why Good People Make Bad Choices is for the individual who wants to experience a more harmonious inner nature, or establish a new direction for their life.
"As you begin to consistently live out your belief system, one choice at a time, your trust in the outcome of integrity will be the incentive to continue. Positive results will prevail, and you will be evolving."
What People Are Saying About Why Good People Make Bad Choices
"I find this to be a very valuable framework for therapy, and for living a good life generally. It is a challenging book that can lead one to a new, more satisfying life." -Robert Rich, PhD, author Cancer: A Personal Challenge.
"Why Good People Make Bad Choices is an incredible tool to aid in the transcendence of the ego and to initiate the establishment of a personal belief system in order to live life with integrity." -Richard A. Singer Jr., psychotherapist, author Your Daily Walk with the Great Minds
"Thought-provoking and well worth the time, this book should be read once throughout and then repeatedly and in small doses. It is bound to trigger a lot of introspection, something we sorely lack in modern life." -Sam Vaknin, author Malignant Self Love: Narcissism Revisited
More information at www.CharlesLawrenceAllen.com
From the New Horizons in Therapy Series Series Editor: Robert Rich, Ph.D.
Published by Loving Healing Press (www.LovingHealing.com)
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Est. Packaging Dimensions: Length: 9.3" Width: 7.5" Height: 0.7" Weight: 0.05 lbs.
Release Date Dec 1, 2006
Publisher Loving Healing Press
ISBN 1932690255 ISBN13 9781932690255
Availability 140 units. Availability accurate as of Jan 23, 2017 04:40.
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Reviews - What do customers think about Why Good People Make Bad Choices: How You Can Develop Peace Of Mind Through Integrity (New Horizons in Therapy Series)?
A Self-Help Tour de Force Nov 26, 2007
The Philosopher's Review on "Why Good People Make Bad Choices: How You Can Develop Peace of Mind through Integrity" by Charles Lawrence Allen
Do you believe that you are a "good" person who sometimes makes a "bad" choice? If so, this book may be for you. But hold on to your hat; there are several things you should know before you dive into this two hundred and sixty page self-help tour de force. First, it's a tough read. Second, it requires motivation and persistence. Third, it can change your life--for the better.
The hypothesis and structure of this book hinge on a negative premise: You have a problem, and its name is "Ego." According to Charles Lawrence Allen, the Ego is "a fundamental aspect of who you are" (5) but has an agenda which may or may not coincide with the choices that `you' would actually like to make-- choices that would allow you to develop integrity and peace of mind. Your Ego wants to survive. Your Ego wishes to minimize pain. It likes to maximize gratification. It also thrives on power and control. Hence, the latter two thirds of Allen's book outline the "The Solution," "The Method," and "The Choice" for overcoming the Ego's agenda. In short, this entails creating and following a consciously created belief system. Bear in mind: The belief system ought to be consciously created from your own consciousness, not from other peoples' or culture. You develop integrity when you begin to act consistently in Your Own Best Interest (YOBI). Some chapters offer follow-up exercises; others do not. I successfully changed my behavior by completing, reviewing, and repeating the follow-up exercises.
Philosophically speaking, Allen's book relies on a distinctly modern understanding of the human self and personal identity. While our primitive, ancient, and medieval counterparts identified with the entire cosmos; the early modern era ushered in the masterful, rational, subjective, individual self and corresponding worldview of the Cosmos as a medley of contingencies. This austere perspective discounts the world as a locus of meaning and appropriates the identification and creation of meaning and identity to the individual subject instead. The result of modern subjectivity is the perception of a self that possesses unbounded and unlimited freedom. Consequently, Allen's book is highly evocative and reminiscent of certain aspects of John Locke's theories. Locke viewed the self as a self-defining subject, and his philosophy emphasized control, self-discipline, freedom, and responsibility. Allen's views on personal identity might also align with Locke's; more information on how Allen views memory--in relation to personal identity--is required for such a comparative analysis, since Locke stressed the importance of memory in his own theories.
I view Allen's book as one of the most unique and effective contributions to the self-help genre. It is not for the faint of heart, vocabulary, or reading skills. His view and personification of the Ego interest me, more so than Freud's. Freud and Allen both successfully personify the Ego, but Allen's personification is much more humanistic than Freud's mechanistic analysis. Use caution with Allen's Ego, however, since the persistent monitoring of the Ego and its agenda, as well as the consistent effort to live from a consciously created belief system, rather than the Ego's agenda, may liken your everyday life to a metaphysical battlefield. Conversely, this monitoring is yet another hallmark of our modern culture--a point well addressed by the late philosopher Michel Foucault. If you do want to change your behavior and make better choices, try this book.
Why Good People Make Bad Choices Jul 18, 2007
We all make bad choices sometimes. We decide that chocolate bars are suddenly part of our healthy nutritional plan. We convince ourselves that since no one will notice, it's okay to leave early from work on Friday afternoons. We watch television instead of spending quality time with our family.
Why Good People Make Bad Choices states that our ego is at fault in all of our bad decisions. The ego is that instinctual part of us all that attempts to protect us from pain while directing us towards pleasure. Unfortunately, the ego does not differentiate between painful experiences that will create growth opportunities and situations that are dangerous. Likewise, there is no distinction between experiences that will create pleasure in the short term but may not necessarily be beneficial to our physical or mental health. In short, our ego isn't always looking out for our best interests. Thus, the key to making good choices is becoming aware of our instinctual behaviours and replacing them with conscious behaviours that reflect personal integrity and how we really want to live our lives.
This book teaches guides the reader to change through awareness one choice at a time. The end goal is simply peace of mind based upon your best interests instead of just seeking experiences that will provide short term pleasure. It also teaches the reader the real meaning of various emotions and how to transform these feelings into more healthy reactions.
An uplifting self-help book for improving one's character and regaining control over one's life Mar 4, 2007
Charles Lawrence Allen, MSW presents Why Good People Make Bad Choices: How You Can Develop Peace of Mind Through Integrity, a self-help guide to overcoming maladaptive behaviors that erode one's personal integrity and therefore one's well-being, as well as how to recognize integrity in others. Chapters discuss how human beings are susceptible to near-automatic "instinctual management" behaviors, and teach methods for managing anger, sadness, fear, and other emotions that threaten to overwhelm one's judgment, actions and integrity, thereby transforming unwanted behavior. An uplifting self-help book for improving one's character and regaining control over one's life, one choice at a time.
Author presents wonderful tool for happiness and peace of mind Dec 11, 2006
Reviewed by Susan Pettrone for Reader Views (8/06)
Within the framework of this 19 Chapter book, the author, Charles Lawrence Allen puts into perspective for the reader, the ego, it's agenda within our lives and how we, the reader, can find peace of mind and happiness through integrity. We learn from the beginning how good choices and bad choices can affect our lives to thepoint of destroying integrity. We learn how to recognize, foster and finally keep integrity foremost within our lives. And we learn that when integrity is foremost, our lives are happier and calmer, as well.
Integrity is often spoken of in everyday life, but if truth be known, few know exactly how to define integrity. Integrity is predictable, trustworthy and dependable. Simply put, in the book, "...you can count on integrity". My oldest son takes Taekwondo, and in his training he has been given some wonderful advice by his instructors. Taekwondo is a sport that is built upon trustworthiness and integrity and the instructors teach the students not just the forms of the sport, but also how to apply the tenants to their lives through simple, easy to understand examples. One statement about integrity has often been used in this way, "Anyone can do the right thing when others are watching, but it takes a person with integrity to do the right thing when there is no one there." This is a simple sentence but one that seems to fit the author's description of integrity well. It is oftentimes hard to "do the right thing" when no one is there to judge you but yourself, but the person of integrity does that right thing and he does it without thinking. The hardest thing about integrity is to have it when no one knows it is being challenged.
I was intrigued with "Why Good People Make Bad Choices" and it's take on integrity. The book is a worthwhile read, and one that is filled with important information and advice. However, I feel it could be improved and made more accessible by streamlining some of the excess wordage. That said, I would still recommend this book to anyone who might be looking for a way to find happiness and peace of mind in their lives. It is well organized, expertly researched and filled with lists and examples that will appeal to an array of readers.
This book would be an excellent addition to the library of any counselor, student of sociology/psychology and those who practice martial arts as well. For while the information is definitely written in a "self help" way, this book could easily further cement a strong belief system already in place. As we all are on a constant journey toward bettering ourselves, "Why Good People Make Bad Choices" is a wonderful tool to help us stay on the straight path toward happiness and peace of mind!