Item description for The Singlehood Phenomenon: 10 Brutally Honest Reasons People Aren't Getting Married by Beverly Rodgers & Tom Rodgers...
If you're single and wanting to be married, you probably know all about the sordid marriage stats. You understand the inherent challenges of marriage. And despite some skepticism, deep down you sill believe in marriage-if only you could find the right person!
The Singlehood Phenomenon is full of hope for singles who have yet to give up on marriage. Drs. Beverly and Tom Rodgers address the top ten reasons singles aren't getting married and show how societal trends such as co-habitation, rampant divorce and the fear of getting hurt make finding a soul mate that much more difficult. Difficult, but not impossible! Deal with your skepticism about dating, love, and marriage and overcome the reasons you stay single. Learn how to integrate psychological principles and biblical truths to develop healthy, Godly love relationships.
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Est. Packaging Dimensions: Length: 0.75" Width: 5.5" Height: 8.25" Weight: 0.45 lbs.
Release Date Sep 30, 2006
Publisher NAV PRESS #111
ISBN 1576838846 ISBN13 9781576838846
Availability 0 units.
More About Beverly Rodgers & Tom Rodgers
Rodgers founded Rodgers Christian Counseling and works with individuals, couples, and families in the Charlotte area. She is a member of the American Congress of Christian Counselors and is certified as Imago Therapist.
Beverly Rodgers currently resides in the state of North Carolina. Beverly Rodgers was born in 1954.
Reviews - What do customers think about The Singlehood Phenomenon: 10 Brutally Honest Reasons People Aren't Getting Married?
Well-articulated points deliver general knowledge about a compelling topic. Feb 4, 2008
A brief read, The Singlehood Phenomenon suggests 10 reasons why attractive and seemingly available Americans are single (31% of the US population was unmarried in 2004. That's up from 10%, in 1970). To illustrate the 10 reasons, the text is peppered with vignettes of unmarried persons with various problem issues.
Sally the Fitness Instructor scares away men.
Don the Pastor attracts needy women.
Rachel the twice-Divorcee is a people pleaser.
These stock characters add life to the authors' points, but fall short of portraying the complex personalities and compelling stories of real people. Another weakness of the work is that the content overall is somewhat dulled, having been mostly borrowed from general counseling knowledge and popular self-help books of the past. Incorporating more applicable research findings would have made for more compelling arguments.
Nonetheless, this book has merit in that it reviews a fresh issue in an otherwise saturated market of relationship self-help. And, while most self-help prescribes a behavioral 1-2-3, seasoned therapists Beverly and Tom Rodgers guide the reader to overcome problem issues, past pains, and unhelpful interpersonal patterns in new ways. For one, they beseech the reader to look inward--to unpack his or her emotional baggage before sabotaging another relationship.
Persons interested in the topic of singleness should buy the book. It is worth reading and the authors include a money-back guarantee: If you're not satisfied you can tear out the title page and mail it to NavPress for a full refund.
A singles book without the sugar Jul 21, 2007
This book is perfect for the rising segment of our nation, the single. It is an excellent book for any single person. They really cover the facts from a bibical point of view without the romantic sap that pollutes other books. The authors really get down to the brass tacks of the situation. I think most readers who are single will find some of themselves in almost every chapter. The story is also interlaced with bible verses. This provides some firm base for what the book has to say. A good book for any single person over the age of 30.
worth your time Feb 12, 2007
Bella Depaulo's opinion(see review below) is not valid, because he just wants people to buy his book...if he has to bash another author's opinion on the subject of singlehood, that is just sad. This is not a perfect book, but it is definitely a worthwhile read as it opened me up to many of my tendencies regarding potential relationships. I am quite a cynic when it comes to relationships and typically don't give this kind of material the time of day, but this one is worth your time.
the authors see singlehood as a crime scene Dec 31, 2006
I became curious about this book because, according to this site, people who buy my book on singles, SINGLED OUT, often buy this book as well. The two books could hardly be more different.
Although Rodgers and Rodgers say on p. 9 that they do not think there is anything wrong with being single, everything else in the book suggests quite the opposite. You can judge this book by the cover. Look at it: Yellow crime scene tape with words like "cynicism" and "perfectionism" is wrapped around their topic, "The Singlehood Phenomenon." Look at the subtitle: "10 Brutally Honest Reasons People Aren't Getting Married." Authors Rodgers and Rodgers know why you are single - there's something wrong with you. This is a singles-bashing book.
In contrast, SINGLED OUT shows, using social science data, that most of the claims that stereotype and stigmatize people are grossly exaggerated or just plain wrong. The Rodgers book accepts the stereotypes at face value. For example, the Rodgers book claims that single men "want to stay little boys who play with their toys" (p. 86). People who stay single, the Rodgers book maintains, will "grow old alone" (p. 162). Rodgers and Rodgers also believe that the effects of divorce on children are "profound, if not traumatic" (p. 82). The authors claim that single people are loners who are also self-centered (p. 84).
There are 89 million American adults who are unmarried. Of course, SINGLED OUT acknowledges, some of them really are immature or selfish, and some children of divorced parents really are traumatized. But most are not. SINGLED OUT also shows, drawing from social science data, that people who get married do not generally become happier, less selfish, or more giving than they were when they were single. And children of single parents are not doomed.
Although there is no forewarning of this in the title, Rodgers and Rodgers practice Christian counseling, and they promise in the introduction to give "practical and biblical ways" of overcoming your reasons for being single. The "practical" reasons are at the end of each chapter. For example: "Pray that the Lord will give you His perspective on marriage. Trust Him to do it and He will" (p. 94). Drawing from Christian writings about men and women, the authors also make statements such as "God designed man to be the leader" (p. 91). In contrast, when SINGLED OUT mentions religion, it is to ask questions such as whether single people are treated as respectfully as married people in their places of worship.
I disagree with almost all of this Rodgers and Rodgers book, but I was not bored by it. The stories about various single people are interesting. But the authors' insistence that single people are more flawed than married people, and that by getting married, they will become better people, is unsupported by science. Moreover, the Rodgers book stigmatizes single people and creates unrealistic expectations about marriage. SINGLED OUT does neither of these things.
Helps you deal with beliefs, behaviors, and struggles with singlehood Nov 4, 2006
My neighbor Kathy shocked me when she told me that she was pregnant. Single and a school teacher, she was struggling to keep her bills paid, her dog fed, and take care of an aging house. Kathy explained to me that the odds of her getting married and having it last were no better than 50/50 and even though she was regularly dating there weren't any real prospects in sight, she wanted children, and she wasn't willing to wait any longer!
Another person confused about marriage by the media, frustrated by dealing with others with similar beliefs, and skeptical about finding a "Soul Mate."
I wish The Singlehood Phenomenon was available then. Written by a couple, Drs. Beverly and Tom Rodgers who've been married for over 30 years and Christian counselors for 26 years, they explain that having a soul mate starts with multiple levels of mutual attraction but then takes work to define, refine, and enhance. That's covered in reason #2 of the 10 Brutally Honest Reasons People Aren't Getting Married.
The 10 reasons are:
1. Skepticism about Love and Marriage 2. Lack of Faith in God's Provision 3. Unresolved Issues From the Past 4. Confusion About the Rules 5. A Poor Understanding of the Purpose of Marriage 6. Fear of Getting Hurt 7. Wanting the Perfect Mate 8. Not Dealing with Prior Heartbreak 9. An Unbalanced Emphasis on Career 10.Concern that My Marriage Will Fail
Each reason gets its' own treatment in a chapter of The Singlehood Phenomenon. Each chapter begins with a definition of the premise and a real life example from the Rodgers years of experience. Each chapter ends with sections on Making it Practical: What About Me?; For Further Thought; and Growing Your Faith.
I think that The Singlehood Phenomenon is a tool that Kathy and other singles, especially Christian singles, should have in their toolbox for dealing with the struggle of finding someone that they can love, and will love them, for a lifetime.